Jeremy's Ramblings, Babblings, and Other Pretentious Bullshit.
Thursday, March 10, 2005
Every now and then I have to question just how "adult" I am. Have I lost too much of my childhood innocence? I don't feel that I am as eccentric as I used to be. I used to give absurd fake names when I ordered drinks at Starbucks, and I'd order food from a drive-thru in a foreign accent. I'd dance around in public and pose motionless next to mannequins when my family was trying on clothes at a department store.
I've found that I've either cut down on doing these things, or just stopped doing them altogether. And then I watch Brey, who walks around in a way that is almost balletic in its fluidity and Keatonesque in its innocent humor, and I wonder if I've lost a bit of joy inside. Am I the kind of people that I used to find sad? The people that walk around, trying so hard to be "grown-up"?
Yes, I do crazy things on stage. I swivel my hips and scream Italian and act like a twelve year-old and conduct the audience as a pretend orchestra. But that's all within the context of a piece of art/entertainment. I don't seem to do the weird things for myself anymore. I used to get such enjoyment out of ordering a coffee under the name of Ghris (complete with the sigh of having lived your life with a name that's "Chris but with a G"), but now the thought doesn't cross my mind until after I've ordered, and I feel a pang of disappointment at picking up my drink as plain old Jeremy.
There's still the possibility that I can recover that part of me that I am sorely missing. I still do the Elvis hip swivel when left to my own devices. I still avoid cracks so that I can save my mom a hefty hospital bill (fixing a broken back isn't cheap). I will do the infamous "herky jerky" upon request. Still, I don't feel it's enough. I need to ignore more of my First American self and reconnect with more of my Seltice Elementary School self. Give me my juice box and "Remains of the Day" lunchbox!
*CRAPPY TRANSITION ALERT* Maybe it's because I'm not getting enough sleep. Hey, speaking of which...
I have become horribly addicted to car naps. Being given two fifteen-minute naps at my work, I have found that I make the best use of this time sleeping in my car. This accomplishes two things. First (and most basic), it gives me an extra fifteen minutes of sleep during a time in which I'm averaging only about five hours of sleep (which is not nearly enough for me).
But second, and most importantly, I have the best dreams during this time. I've been notorious for several years for not having interesting dreams. I will actually go and watch a movie in my dream. How absurd is that? During a time in which I am fully at the mercy of my subconscious, and can go anywhere and do anything, I sit on a couch and watch fucking "Moulin Rouge"? Which I've already seen?
However, sleeping in my car in the middle of the day is another matter altogether. Suddenly, my dreams are wild and frantic, filled with recent events and amazing imagery. I think the reason for this could be that, with my very busy schedule, I have several different things on my mind. And while I shut my brain down at night, I am still thinking with all cylinders during the day. So the subconscious, already working overtime, suddenly goes into sixth gear when I abandon the real world.
The most astounding part, however, is that I go on adventures that last several hours, in which many things are seen and done, and then I wake up in my car to find out only ten minutes have passed. Apparently, my mind is packed with so much to think about that it somehow slows down time when I have my naps. It's really quite amazing.
On a somewhat unrelated topic, let me just do a couple of shameless plugs and talk about what could be the best one-two punch of Orange County theatre since "Assassins" and "Gog/Magog Project". The rehearsal process for Darcy Hogan's "The Land Southward" has been among the smoothest of any show I've ever done. The script is fantastic, the cast is really on their game and we could open next week if we wanted to (not that we want to). It's a fascinating piece that definitely should to be seen by anyone and everyone.
Then after that, it's "Marat/Sade", one of the most brilliant 20th century plays ever written in my opinion. Only problem is, it's also talky and rather pretentious. But the Hunger Artists Theatre asked me to rework the script, and I think it's definitely an improvement. Auditions are going to be this Sunday, and you KNOW that I'm gonna be all up on that sucka. Knowing the director and some of the other actors who are planning on auditioning, this is going to be a really great piece of theatre.
So if you're not doing anything from April 1st through May 29th, go see a couple of shows.
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