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Jeremy's Ramblings, Babblings, and Other Pretentious Bullshit.
Tuesday, September 07, 2004
 
Driving to L.A. recently, I passed by Staples Center, and saw a sign proclaiming, "Val Kilmer is Moses!" It was an advertisement for a production of "The Ten Commandments" that will be playing at the Kodak Theater. That sentence, "Val Kilmer is Moses", struck me as odd, mainly because it's untrue.

Val Kilmer is Val Kilmer. He's not Moses. He's not Batman. He's not even Jim Morrison. He's Val Kilmer. Always was, always will be, and no Staples Center sign will tell me otherwise.

My problem with it is that it wasn't "The Ten Commandments starring Val Kilmer as Moses". It was simply "Val Kilmer IS Moses". Fuck the real Moses. Charleston WHOston? You thought you knew Moses, but you don't know Moses. You remember that guy from "Willow"? Yeah, HE'S Moses! Remember that song "Moses Supposes His Toses Are Roses"? They're talking about Val Kilmer. He's Moses, ya know.

I was wondering at what point an actor becomes their role. After all, Val Kilmer is now Moses. No entertainment show can mention Pierce Brosnon without saying the words "James Bond". At the theater I work at, I've been referred to often by the roles that I play ("Hey, Zangara!" "What's up, Gog?" "How's it hanging, Harry Potter?"). Once in L.A. I parked my car and watched a bus pass by that had an advertisement for the upcoming TV show "Joey". There was a picture of Matt LeBlanc smiling and giving me a thumbs-up that is undoubtedly supposed to be saying, "How YOU doin'?" Well, guess what, folks. Matt LeBlanc is Joey!

Actors are the new gods, and the irony is that many of them don't get to have their godlike status while maintaining their identity. They can only be a god as their most popular screen persona. That's probably why they get paid large, unwarranted sums of money.

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